There's no two ways about it, it's been a long tough road to get back to racing. My last race was in Kona 2011 where I DnF'ed. That was 2 1/2 yrs ago, which in racing years (which are kinda like dog years) is a long time. I'm sure at some point I'll get round to sharing some of my reasons, thoughts and emotions throughout those two years, but now's not the time. For now I want to focus on the positives and change my mindset from that of "the forever injured Julie Dibens" back to "the I'm a Professional triathlete Julie Dibens".
Racing was kind of a big deal for me today. There has been a lot of fear, doubt and questioning going on, and I had to put those Gremlins to rest. The only way to do that was to get out there and race, and race hard against some fast fast girls!
My two biggest questions were as to whether 1) I could still do it/did I still have it and 2) would I still enjoy it. This 2nd one may sound silly, but it's so important!
Thankfully, I can say that I loved it. During the swim I found myself smiling to myself as I tucked in behind Roka teammate Meredith Kessler. "Now this is what it's all about". Once out on the bike I was in my familiar "happy place", and of course relished the opportunity to be leading the race. I definitely felt somewhat rusty and unsure as to my pacing. Was I going hard enough?, too hard? I really wasn't sure. But regardless, I was out there riding my bike in a beautiful setting, the sun was shining and I had a whole gaggle of girls trying to chase me down! Yeah baby!
Obviously I entered T2 a little anxious as to how the body parts would feel on the run, but left pleasantly surprised. Not too bad! From T2 to the finish it was just about me doing what I had came here to do, get to the finish line, test the knee and the snaggle toes and see where I stacked up in probably the most stacked field Ever! Ok just kidding on that part, but the way Heather W and Jacko raced, u don't ever get much faster than that! Other than two big as your face blisters things were good, and despite my appearance crossing the finish line I was delighted with my result. Just somewhat overwhelmed I think with built up emotion and somewhat amazed at the support I got out on the run course. While I may not acknowledge the cheers and words of encouragement, I definitely heard them.
So now this race is done, I feel I can move forward. I feel I can make that mental adjustment and start believing again, which I have no doubt will help me raise the bar in my training. My next race will be in St George in early May. By all accounts it sounds like an epic course and one I look forward to tackling.
I can't say it enough but I really wouldn't still be dreaming big if it wasn't for some great people around me. They know who they are and I thank them all. It's easier this way because i can't miss anyone out.... Not that i would... Or have ever done that before.... Cough cough!
And to my sponsors: I need to thank Trek bicycles, Powerbar and ISM saddles for your continued support the last 3 yrs. You stood by me through a couple of dry years! Thank you, and I hope to do you proud this year. And to two new sponsors who had the balls to take me on during the drought; Roka, your wetsuit I am in Love with! And I hope every swim I do is cold enough for me to bust out that bad boy! And Louis Garneau for your quality kit and helmets. Thank you both for adding me to your team.
A big shout out to Heather W, Jacko and MBK for some fast racing. There is no doubt these girls have raised the bar while I've been sitting around perfecting the art of cookie eating! Chapeau! girls. It was an honor to race with you today girls.
Until next time Dream big! Or don't dream at all